Yasmine, 19, from Beirut

Where did you grow up and where do you live?

I grew up in Beirut, Lebanon and I just finished my first year as an architecture student in Milan.

Can you describe one moment or memory that has stayed with you during the war in Beirut?

When I was in Milan, the war had started to get really bad and one thing I would do is never turn my phone off or put it on silent when I slept, just in case I had to hear some bad news from home. I feel that describes the situation I was in, being so far away from my parents, my little sister and the rest of my family and friends. At that time there were bombings almost every night in Dahieh, which is an area very close to my family’s home. I just needed to be sure my family was safe.

What was daily life for you like at the time living away from your family?

My friends in Milan noticed that I was down a lot of the time so it was nice that I was able to talk to them about it, even if they don’t fully understand. It is nice to see the effort some of them made to empathise and to cheer me up.

I still went to all of my classes because it felt like a good distraction. But a lot of times, I would not go out with my friends and I would stay alone because I didn’t think it was fair. My nights in Milan were about going out, partying and meeting new people, which is normal for the first months of student life. But knowing my family’s nights were disturbed by bombings didn’t exactly put me in a fun, social mood. It just felt very wrong, I wanted to be in touch with them all the time.

My mum didn’t want me to worry and she wanted me to live my own life in Milan, so she wouldn’t update me so much. When I found out about bombings or something else happening without her telling me, I would get very mad. I know that it comes from a good place and that she just didn’t want me to worry and get on with starting my new life in Milan. She was kind of protecting me. I was mad but I was just so worried about them that it was difficult to shut it out and not keep in touch so much. 

Was there something that gave you comfort or hope when you were away from home?

Not really hope, but talking to my older sister would help me a lot. She would always look at the brighter side of things, and that made me realise that, of course as bad as it is, theyre not bombing the whole city, only certain areas that my family knows to avoid. But to be honest, it was never really that comforting. Nothing could make the situation more comforting while I knew there was still war going on. Because anything can happen at anytime if there is still war. 

If you could say anything to someone your age who is away from their family that is living in conflict, what would you say?

Always communicate, make sure they’re fine. Even though you know they are, they can always be at the wrong place at the wrong time.